Muse

there are so many familiar faces around me on the boat. each of us scattered on different docks. im on my own along with sher and david L. were frantically for joel G and daniel K, who were being chased by the gay maniac captain demanding sex from them. |=

and there they are when we open the laundry chute. now we are deciding how to fit 8 people into a waja on our escapade. vijay's the driver, and the person beside him was faceless. i was behind , khe cia squeezed somewhere beside me. i remember david L's teeth chattering.
naichien, who was wearing a neck brace couldn't squeeze in with us.
so he,thum, daniel G and sher end up in 3 other separate cars. thum and naichien were driven by our so called charperones. daniel K and sher was driving a car each for reasons to complicated to explain (R.T.C.T.E)

then the gay captain's men were on pursuit behind my car. (that's when david L's whole body was shivering and cold sweating)

so we decided to park our car somewhere, away from detection till the matter chills. driving into a car workshop, we ended having to negotiate with the owner on renting the parking space from him. he named rm 300 at first, i tried pulling it down to rm200. then he got pissed and &#^$@ in hokkien. then spit out an even more outrageous price, rm500! take or leave.

that's when i got a call. daniel K said i had asked for suann's number earlier. he said sorry for not giving it to me ASAP. then he laugh bout some funny story pertaining to that incident.
in the background, i was walking somewhere with railings and with steps reaching the dark labryinth below. still on the phone, i slowly climb my way down and realize, at the bottom of the steps, this could be a perfect space to hide our car!

*at the bottom, was a man-made fountain and an altar on its right top-hand corner. the only lighting came from above, where i was standing earlier.

khecia saw me waving and called the rest. i climbed my way up while still on the phone. almost reaching the top, i recognize that nagging feeling behind my back suddenly. it was like deja vu. i recognized that shrine as the one belonging to a psychopathic serial killer (PSK). khecia was already on her way down there when i turned to warn her.

bit too late. i saw his pale face staring back at me in stoic. his sharp nose and angulated jawline. his eyes, they were black and looking at me. i do remember his face (but cant remember my field educator's face whom i just met this morning) that figure move as we both caught sight of his gleaming cleaver in his left arm. without prompt, khecia ran straight back up. and i start talking staccato on the phone telling daniel K to get help. the PSK was up on our level. already, david L, david T and a few other vague faces were there to help. but sayumi *no idea where she appeared from* was already slashed. her bloody body slumped against the wall.

on the other end of the phone, i was momentarily stilled by the sound of screeching and screaming and i heard sher's name. then i was screaming. both at daniel K. and the cleaver heading my way. the phonecall ended abruptly but i manage to get a hand on the cleaver and somehow threw it back at the PSK. after sequences of event, i found myself desperately trying to call back daniel and sher while chopping that PSK's wrist (sawing actually) when he was restrained by others.

both his hands were dismembered painstakingly slow by me, partly because of the lack of equipment, strength and i was multitasking *spare the midget yo*

the odd thing, PSK seems to be mocking me, he wasnt screaming in agony, more like sadistically smiling and laughing at me; challenging me to it. so i slice some of his flesh from his arm. then his face twisted in anguish and pain.

so we left that scene. we rush to the site of the accident. su ann called me and said daniel, sher, naichien and thum were all involved in an accident. they're dead. she gave me a blur account of events. a truck hit the car naichien and thum was in, causing their car to flip into the river.

in sher and daniel's case, both their car hit each another and they both ended up in the river as well. basically they were hitting on each another la *pun so intended =p*

so yeah, i was hysterical to the point of numbness. joel broke down. the rest was shocked. like, what the fuck??

we were ushered to the paramedics to get medical treatment for out wounds. apparently i have a deep laceration on my right arm of which i couldn't feel a thing *it is a dream after all* none of us bothered to go look at the bodies. after wrestling with a gay captain and a PSK, were were mentally and emotionally incapable of handling deaths.

but to end my dream at this point would have been so not my style. the crowds got more frenzied once again. apparently they found the wreckage of the cars and a number of 'bodies'. i spontaneously elbowed my way through the throng of bystanders. *not an easy job* when i manage to pass the police and the tape, i saw them pulling naichien out. and the paremedics declared him alive but with signs of renal failure. *zomg! we learnt bout renal failure this week*

then they pulled thum out, he's safe from heaven and hell too. breathing, so to say. then........

-phone vibrated with message-

seriously, like.. SERIOUSLY???? owh well, sorry sher, and daniel K. i dont know if you guys walked towards the light at the end of the tunnel or not. (=

that's all from the works of my sick and sadistically twisted mind. i wrote it as soon as i jumped out of bed. this is as fresh as it can get so i wont miss bits and pieces of it.

P.S: the above was not a draft of fiction i write in lectures, its a dream i had while afternoon napping. heh

today, i did perhaps the oddest favor so far for a stranger. i honked for him. |=

well, klang fellas are well known for their double parking skills. so this guy's car was blocked by another car. and conveniently, his horn was spoilt and he couldn't possible go screaming at the masses of people eating in the mamak. *duh*

so he approached my car *was waiting for poo and sammy*

stranger : hello. can you help me honk? cause my horn is spoilt and my car cant get out..
me : err.. okay.

damn weird at first. feeling idiotic as well. im honking for another person. wtf? im like honking short blast at first (shy honks) then it got more fun. ahahhahah! so i hit it like full blast to the point i almost LOL in the car. *luckilly there's no one around to stop and stare*

too bad the pea-brained car owner cant hear it. so my stranger had to drum his fingers with frustrations till the car is moved . my friends came back into the car.

so i haven't an ending to his story. hope he didn't had to wait that long. *grins*

sometimes, trying too hard is just trying too hard.

when voices go unheard and we end up trailing the footsteps of others..

i wonder if there is a need to live up to others status quo.

a need to walk glorified with your name plastered on their lips.

to have that need and to lift that weight that more than often pulls down that smile.

in shadows, sometimes we have to learn to thrive.

i shout my claim of stronghold upon my life, only to relent others to circle in my head of fickleness. im relapsing into my past. im falling deeper this time around. with even more spite to be left with. you can hear my masked pretence. or maybe you will not. as i seat up on nights to paranoid over whispers behind, rolling about in that periodical guilt and impracticality of a rant.

and the world spin its colors into the monochrome of blackness. and the heaviness pressing all its weight on my face. like its telling me, im undeserving of my voice. and claims to have read me. how true can it be?

you want the sun but you loathe the heat. so what do you want?
you know the sea is deep, but you still leave the shore. why did you?
you know the rust is eating all the steel there is, and you let it be. how could you?
you want me, but you dont want me. what is this?

in a long while, home hasn't cross my mind. and when the time is too long, we all go back to where we begin, despite all the initial loathsome feelings. its alright to pace down the world sometimes.

when the tide had caught up to you and sprayed you wet.. its time to dry up. *grins* to say the least, we deserve all the time in the world to sit back and flip our hair in the salty breeze, after a long day done at calming the storm.