Muse

today's one of those days im laced with foulness, restlessness and a moment of blankness. after that many mondays through fridays, the counting down seems suddenly a matter of life and death.

i correlate such feelings to the situation below.

imagine you're standing on the curb. you look up and saw a face. she's holding up a flower pot, and let it go straight at you. the building was 40 stories high. you watch the pot coming right at you. you didnt move cause you know there's still minutes to spare. you watch it coming in with such sang froid, thinking you'll just step aside at the last moment. after all, how long will it take you to take a step to the left?

then gravity began its reign, pulling the pot closer closet to your face. that's when you realize you're pretty much in a fucked up position. the last few seconds induce that panic stricken face, surfaces the thought of "oh shit!" and then you go blank.

maybe im just not cut out to be who i am today. dreaming has always been a reality, and reality has all this while remain a dream. such dangerous idealism still lurking around even after 20 years.